• << Back to 5-Rings.com
  • |
  • Blog Home
  • |
  • About the Author
  • |
  • Sample Chapter
  • ||

Stars

Posted: October 28th, 2008 under Uncategorized.
Tags: Anati, book, Cauinn, Cirellio, muse, style, writing

Cirellio enters Shiira, ties off his horse and gets hydrated. He wanders the city until he finds his target, a building called a ‘relic house’, which is much like a city museum.

Before long, people start flocking south to prepare for the Feast of the Eight, but a woman appears to be following him.

No matter how many turns he takes, she keeps pursuing. When he finally lets her catch up, it turns out her name is Cauinn, a mystic. A Legionnaire.

She can tell he’s a thief right away and disapproves of his lifestyle. He doesn’t think much of mystics, either.

Her black curly hair has many silver stars ornamenting it, and she uses them to illustrate what she can do. She talks about how she dreams of a sea of stars, how each star represents a soul, and that his soul shines brighter than most.

Cirellio believes she is trying to con him, but feels somewhat compelled to stay and listen, anyway. Their conversation has him wondering if mystics really can see more than a typical person, but he’s always able to come up with an alternate explanation. 

After their conversation, she abruptly leaves, but not before cutting a tuft of his hair free with an ornamental dagger she had hanging around her neck, saying he can ‘have it back’ if he joins her at the feast.

The conversation leaves him with an odd feeling. He figures Cauinn was a sociopath, but meant well.

With nightfall approaching, he sheds his white robe and disappears into the shadows, out of sight of the guards.

WC: 981
Total: 5,388

Writing this, Cirellio thought of everything in terms of fate and was skeptical of nearly everything Cauinn had to say, while Cauinn herself was somewhat curious in Cirellio, but was, on the whole, unimpressed. Their dissonance created an interesting, unpredictable conversation.

Prev: Happy Birthday To Me!!! | Next: Letters delivered

« « Happy Birthday To Me!!! | Letters delivered » »


6 Comments »

  1. Ooh, I like this very much. Certainly the type of story I would enjoy reading. I liked the snippet you wrote – you explained the scene perfectly without giving away too much. I’m all curious now.

    [Reply]

    Comment by Latrina — October 28, 2008 @ 7:25 pm


  2. I wondered one thing, which I couldn’t get from what you wrote here. namely: what exactly did she want from him that was so urgent that she had to follow him around with such persistence? You know that I’m not criticising, only trying to understand. Did she just want his hair?

    [Reply]

    Comment by packsister — October 29, 2008 @ 9:53 am


  3. @Latrina: Thanks! These summaries are meant to help me see the big picture. They kind of let me know the bare-minimum I could get away with and still have all the events of the story unfold; tells me what is and is not necessary.
    I’m so glad you enjoyed it.

    @packsister: The girl who was following him wasn’t urgently following him per se. Just following at a walking pace. (And if Cirellio would have taken off running, it would have gathered a lot of attention.)
    She followed him only because she was fascinated by him, but that’s not something Cirellio is ready to understand at this point, and it’s from his POV.
    He also has NO IDEA why she would cut off a tuft of his hair. Neither does the reader ;) It’s quite unexpected, isn’t it? Why that happened will be revealed later, like halfway through the book.

    [Reply]

    Comment by cirellio — October 29, 2008 @ 11:31 am


  4. Ah, okay. You see, all I had to go on from was you saying: “No matter how many turns he takes, she keeps pursuing.” and that sounded quite like urgent following to me. So she was just fascinated? Must have been REALLY fascinated. I do realise the reader wasn’t yet supposed to know what she wanted with his hair, and I really am eager to find out, so you just keep us updated here!

    [Reply]

    Comment by packsister — October 29, 2008 @ 12:53 pm


  5. yeah – that was my fault. I should’ve made it more clear. I guess in my trying to be succinct, it came off as urgent.

    Anyway, she’s definitely pretty intrigued by Cirellio … imagine walking around and being able to tell how important people are or are going to be to the world—Cauinn can do just that. So she asks herself ‘how could a mere thief make such a big difference in this world? And will it be a good difference or a bad difference?’ Would you feel an obligation to watch these people, just to make sure they weren’t going to cause harm? Especially after you’ve seen it happen
    before?

    [Reply]

    Comment by cirellio — October 29, 2008 @ 4:12 pm


  6. I have nothing to say but this:

    Dude, I’m digging this majorly.

    [Reply]

    Comment by christopher. — October 30, 2008 @ 11:49 am



~TrackBack URL~

Leave a comment

Click to cancel reply

Subscribe!
 
...by RSS Feed


...by Email

 

October 2008
S M T W T F S
« Sep   Nov »
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  

Tweets->

  • I've had a vision: A New Word Processor for Fantasy Novel Writers! - http://t.co/slVp1lUq 11 hours ago
  • Writing Journal Entry for 02-06 - http://t.co/UcYOgwgc 2012/02/06
  • Journal entry for 1-31 - http://t.co/R55wwbVO 2012/01/31
  • This morning's journal entry. - http://t.co/Rn6Noklt 2012/01/30
  • YTD - http://t.co/EEI44DQ4 2012/01/29

Recent Comments

  • Merrilee on I’ve had a vision: A Word Processor for Fantasy Novel Writers!
  • Merrilee on Writing Journal Entry for 02-06
  • Ryan G. Sanders on Writing Journal Entry for 02-06
  • Brian on Journal entry for 1-31
  • Brian on YTD

Recent Posts

  • I’ve had a vision: A Word Processor for Fantasy Novel Writers!
  • Writing Journal Entry for 02-06
  • Journal entry for 1-31
  • This morning’s journal entry.
  • YTD

Archives

  • February 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • November 2011
  • October 2011
  • September 2011
  • August 2011
  • July 2011
  • June 2011
  • May 2011
  • April 2011
  • March 2011
  • February 2011
  • January 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • October 2010
  • September 2010
  • August 2010
  • July 2010
  • June 2010
  • May 2010
  • April 2010
  • March 2010
  • February 2010
  • January 2010
  • December 2009
  • November 2009
  • September 2009
  • August 2009
  • July 2009
  • June 2009
  • May 2009
  • April 2009
  • March 2009
  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • September 2008
  • August 2008
  • July 2008
  • June 2008
  • May 2008
  • April 2008
  • March 2008

Resources for Writers:


The Word Cloud writing community
Limyaael's Rants
Fantasy Worldbuilding Questions

Blogs by Well-known Authors:


The Dragonmount Blog
Patrick Rothfuss
Brandon Sanderson
Neil Gaiman

Writing Broadcasts:


Writing Excuses Podcast

Fellow Writers:


Not Enough Words
Ryan G. Sanders
Soul Saga
C.R. Hindmarsh
Davina Pearson
The Awake Ones
One Swaying Behind
SmithWriting Blog
Natania Barron
Tales of a Fantasy Scribbler
Right Brain Spasms
Ken Kizer
Steph-O-Rama

Miscellaneous:


Blisters In May
Goodreads

How-To Blogs - BlogCatalog Blog Directory Add to Technorati Favorites

Creative Commons License
FIVE RINGS by NICK ENLOWE is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.
Based on a work at 5-Rings.com. [E]





Copyright © 2007-2012 Nick Enlowe.

MCN: W16-4STV-6080